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  • One of those days...

    I got trampled by a HERD of drama llamas tonight.

    The Boy (tm) and I decided that since mom was out for the evening with girlfriends, we were going out on the town to Subway for dinner.

    It was like Adventures in Babysitting.

    Tally thus far:

    Explosive diahrrea? Check.

    Feces-stained clothes? Check.

    Near fight with random homeless guy on a train platform? Check.

    Abusive fast-food employee who almost got punched out? Check.

    Exploding light bulb? Check.

    Unconscious-as-a-result-of-getting-hit-by-a-door cat? Check.

    Vinegar all over the porch from trying to wake cat? Check.

    Thumbtack in foot? Check.

    Missing-then-found Glock? Check.

    Overloaded washer with soap bubbles coming out? Check.

    Front steps covered in glass from above light bulb? Check.

    Hose squirting me in the face? Check.

    WHAT ELSE??????????????


  • #2
    WOW! And you trademarked your son? (tm)
    sigpic
    Rocket Science
    Making everything else look simple, since 1958.


    http://my.opera.com/integrator/blog/
    One Man's Opinion

    The Future. It isn't what it used to be.

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    • #3
      WOW!!

      It reads like an outline for a Leslie Nielsen movie script! When you recover, you should write it up and send it to a production company.
      That's a direct quote. Not word for word, but the gist of it.

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      • #4
        WOW! Remind me to go anywhere with you! LOL!

        Be Safe,

        Hank
        " We are determined that before the sun sets on this terrible struggle, our flag will be recognized throughout the world as a symbol of freedom on one hand and of overwhelming force on the other" - General George C. Marshall

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        • #5
          Originally posted by officerchick View Post
          WOW!!

          It reads like an outline for a Leslie Nielsen movie script! When you recover, you should write it up and send it to a production company.
          When and if I recover, I'm just going to start drinking. Heavily.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by integrator97 View Post
            WOW! And you trademarked your son? (tm)
            It was easier than cloning.

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            • #7
              LOL...sounds like you and your son had a day to be remembered I feel for ya
              "Life In Every Breath"

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              • #8
                Originally posted by OccamsRazor View Post
                When and if I recover, I'm just going to start drinking. Heavily.
                Thats a good idea, just make sure you have enough and I strongly suguest locking yourself in a rubber room, keep the booze in a styrofoam cooler to avoid the (in your case more than likely) fridge shorting out and exploading.
                I'm the guy you don't want to be around when your doing something wrong, but you can't wait for me to get there when your down, to fix you up...

                If you don't stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them.

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                • #9
                  Taking up a few shifts to help out my friend's business (on leave for a month), his 8 y/o son came to work with us on a remote site for a few hours until his wife could collect him after her late o/t. The building is empty from 1600 on a Friday so at around 1800, they headed off to get a feed and fill up his car so I guess 1900 before they got back. Around 1915, father storms in angry as son had been shown every food outlet in the mall and said "I don't like that, Dad". I tried not to smile as my friend stormed off to conduct a patrol.

                  Young bloke tells me he is hungry so we agree on Pizza Hut and have it delivered 30 minutes later. Father comes back from patrol to see son munching on pizza and then asks why he did not get a pizza when they were out ? Son sits up to say "Dad, that pizza is yucky. The best pizza is what the man brings to the house". Pizza Hut deliver from the same outlet but how could you argue with such culinary knowledge ?
                  "Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer" Sun Tzu

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                  • #10
                    Oh come on now?

                    Isn't that an average day with your child?

                    Seriously, next time the two of you go out, take along several of your friends with ccw's. Tell them you will buy them dinner, just to come along and protect you.

                    Maybe you should bring a priest (or religious person of your faith) to pray for you while out, because you definatly had a day from HELL .

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                    • #11
                      Not my kid - I have none ........ that I know of anyway.

                      Mind you he would have been for sale on ebay for 1 cent if his poor father had not seen him eating with me that night ? He was pulling a 24 hour shift (his business) and I was covering the other shift with him so he had minus time for the poor boy to discuss his nutritional likes.
                      "Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer" Sun Tzu

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by OccamsRazor View Post
                        I got trampled by a HERD of drama llamas tonight.

                        The Boy (tm) and I decided that since mom was out for the evening with girlfriends, we were going out on the town to Subway for dinner.

                        It was like Adventures in Babysitting.

                        Tally thus far:

                        Explosive diahrrea? Check.

                        Feces-stained clothes? Check.

                        Near fight with random homeless guy on a train platform? Check.

                        Abusive fast-food employee who almost got punched out? Check.

                        Exploding light bulb? Check.

                        Unconscious-as-a-result-of-getting-hit-by-a-door cat? Check.

                        Vinegar all over the porch from trying to wake cat? Check.

                        Thumbtack in foot? Check.

                        Missing-then-found Glock? Check.

                        Overloaded washer with soap bubbles coming out? Check.

                        Front steps covered in glass from above light bulb? Check.

                        Hose squirting me in the face? Check.

                        WHAT ELSE??????????????

                        This is everyday for me "cubed". IT ONLY GETS WORSE!!! (just kidding of course)
                        My wife and I are just glad we finally don't have to change diapers anymore, as we did for almost 9 years. Just got the last one out of them about a year and a half ago.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by CAP View Post
                          This is everyday for me "cubed". IT ONLY GETS WORSE!!! (just kidding of course)
                          My wife and I are just glad we finally don't have to change diapers anymore, as we did for almost 9 years. Just got the last one out of them about a year and a half ago.
                          For a minute I thought you were just really slow at diaper training.
                          sigpic
                          Rocket Science
                          Making everything else look simple, since 1958.


                          http://my.opera.com/integrator/blog/
                          One Man's Opinion

                          The Future. It isn't what it used to be.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I thought it might have been some sort of fetish that grown men and some who have lost control of their functions may utilise.

                            First day at school today for my mate's youngest bloke. He rang me during the week to say his son found his new uniform and got ready LAST WEEK being told you go to school `next thursday` - just a week early.
                            "Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer" Sun Tzu

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