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In Honour of Stupib people

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  • In Honour of Stupib people

    In Honour Of Stupid People


    n Honour of Stupid People:

    In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
    stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

    On Woolworth's Tiramisu dessert (printed on the bottom)
    " Do not turn upside down."
    (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

    On Pick n' Pay's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
    (talk about a news flash)

    On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate
    machinery after taking this medication."
    (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
    could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

    On a Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
    " Product will be hot after heating."
    (...and you thought????. ..)

    On a Clicks hair dryer -
    Do not use while sleeping.
    (That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

    On a bag of Simba Chips --
    You could be a winner! No purchase necessary!
    Details inside.
    (the shoplifter special?)

    On a bar of Dove soap -
    "Directions: Use like regular soap."
    (and that would be???....)

    On some Checkers frozen dinners -
    " Serving suggestion: Defrost."
    (please note that it's just a suggestion.)

    On the packaging of a Rowenta iron -
    " Don't iron clothes on body."
    (but wouldn't this save me time?)

    On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
    (..I'm taking this because???.. ..)
    On some brands of Christmas lights of Eastern origin:
    "For indoor or outdoor use only."
    (As opposed to what?)

    On a Japanese food processor:
    "Not to be used for the other use."
    (Now, somebody out there, please help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

    Instructions on a SA Airways packet of peanuts -
    [1] Open packet;
    [2] Eat nuts.
    (Step 3: say what?)

    On a child's Superman costume:
    "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
    (Don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
    On a German chainsaw ..
    "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
    (Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

  • #2
    The wife likes to watch a little TV from time to time, and will always get my attention when a medication commercial comes on; we love to hear the 'side effects' they list...Ever pay attention to those? Certain anti-depressants feature the side effects of depression, suicidal thoughts, and mood swings.

    There's one, I think it was an osteoperosis medication, that listed everything from nausea and vomiting to hair loss, internal and/or rectal bleeding, and death as 'potential side effects'.

    Scares the crap out of me.


    • #3
      Very funny post.


      • #4
        Originally posted by Steve354 View Post
        On a bag of Simba Chips --
        You could be a winner! No purchase necessary!
        Details inside.
        We received 3 crates of optical turnstiles. Each crate was about 6' long x 5' high and 4' wide. Had about 20 or 25 screws to get the top off, to get to the instuctions along with everything else. On page three of the book: How to open crate.
        Rocket Science
        Making everything else look simple, since 1958.

        One Man's Opinion

        The Future. It isn't what it used to be.


        • #5
          On a Japanese food processor:
          "Not to be used for the other use."
          (Now, somebody out there, please help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

          A year or so ago there was an infomercial where as the Knuckle head (Chef Tony) selling a food processor put some chunks of cement in it to show that it would turn it back into powder and be reused. People actually tried this at home with disastrous results to them selves and the mach. My guess is they were referring to that.


          • #6
            I especially like the ones where it's an electrical appliance. "Do not immerse in water"
            "Life In Every Breath"


            • #7
              Clorox Wipes

              In bold print on a jar of Clorox Disinfectant Kitchen Wipes: "Do not use as a baby wipe or for personal cleansing"
              The law is reason free from passion." -- Aristotle


              • #8
                I used to like reading the hotel warning signs in Asia. "Using Hair-Blower, Do not use in Shower". My colleage took a pic of it so that no-one would believe me.

                Another one and I have the sign for it as a pic and will locate it for all of you to laugh at is how to use a dunny (toilet) for asian students at a college I had a contract at. It showed a X for standing on the seat and taking aim but a Tick (Check Mark for the yanks) for sitting on the seat and taking aim. I also covered the Facility Managers Job if he was away (just babysitting) and recall him needing to replaced 80% of the seats due to incorrect use.
                "Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer" Sun Tzu