Dumb Crook

[SecTrainer]

When two service station attendants in Iowa refused to hand over money to a drunken robber, he threatened to call the police.

Amused, the employees continued to refuse to give him the money. The robber became enraged and called the police, who arrived and promptly busted his chops.

[SecTrainer]

Have Guns, Won't Travel

Seems there's this company in Arizona called "Guns for Hire" that stages old-west style gunfights for the movies, dude ranches and Wild West shows.

One day, they received a call from a woman who had found them in the Yellow Pages. She wanted to hire them to kill her husband. She got 4-1/2 years in prison. The extra 6 months must have been tacked on for criminal stupidity.