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  • ~Working Security and having a family.

    My question is,has working security affected your relationship with you and your family,or even friends.

    Iv been doing security for quite sometime and it never really has affected me up until recently,while I aint married the girlfriend doesnt really like the fact of me basicly being on call. Our company is short staffed but doesnt want to really hire anymore. So on any of us can be called and asked to come in,and well I dont wanna turn down money.

    So with being on call,or people not showing up to relieve you,or you having to cover others shift,has it affected your family time,or even your social life?

    I often find that when im not working,I just wanna stay home and relax,and I love every minute of it. Now,im a young guy so some would be suprised but thats what it is. Haha

  • #2
    Originally posted by Riderboxer View Post
    My question is,has working security affected your relationship with you and your family,or even friends.

    Iv been doing security for quite sometime and it never really has affected me up until recently,while I aint married the girlfriend doesnt really like the fact of me basicly being on call. Our company is short staffed but doesnt want to really hire anymore. So on any of us can be called and asked to come in,and well I dont wanna turn down money.

    So with being on call,or people not showing up to relieve you,or you having to cover others shift,has it affected your family time,or even your social life?

    I often find that when im not working,I just wanna stay home and relax,and I love every minute of it. Now,im a young guy so some would be suprised but thats what it is. Haha
    I will say that I've never been a fan of on-call work. The closest thing to on call work I do now is last-minute security details (close protection) and investigations.

    My recommendation would be to get a job that gives you more of a schedule. If you've done security for quite some time, you should be competitive for a job like that, assuming that you've also been improving your qualifications.

    But no, this industry has never negatively affected any of my relationships because it's always been understood by myself and everyone else that things come up, and can be expected.

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    • #3
      I worked about 25 years on the 15h00 to 23h00 or 16h00 to 24h00 shift then was on call until 05h00. I slept from 05h00 to 13h00. My wife worked days. I only have 1 daughter. Wonder why?
      I enforce rules and regulations, not laws.
      Security Officers. The 1st First Responders.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
        I worked about 25 years on the 15h00 to 23h00 or 16h00 to 24h00 shift then was on call until 05h00. I slept from 05h00 to 13h00. My wife worked days. I only have 1 daughter. Wonder why?
        Yea i hardly ever had to work 2nd,Id hate doing that. Was offered a f/t second shift position,and turned it down. Wouldnt have a life.

        Im more of a night owl,so night shift works out good. However I find working why the world sleeps and sleeping why the worlds awake can somewhat cut into a social life with family and friends. But I do find less people wanna do night shift so I have less competition and more jobs put on my plate.

        However the older I get the more Im thinking 1st shift would be more my thing,never been a morning person,but the few times Iv worked it,it wasent bad once I got outta bed. Ha

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Nauticus View Post
          I will say that I've never been a fan of on-call work. The closest thing to on call work I do now is last-minute security details (close protection) and investigations.

          My recommendation would be to get a job that gives you more of a schedule. If you've done security for quite some time, you should be competitive for a job like that, assuming that you've also been improving your qualifications.

          But no, this industry has never negatively affected any of my relationships because it's always been understood by myself and everyone else that things come up, and can be expected.
          To be honest,the on call thing can have its pro's and con's in my opnion. For one,it usually pays more,because you'll get floaters pay,plus if you dont feel like working or cant make it in due to unreasonable circumstances,then if they call you can polietly refuse. The cons are,you have to be flexable and willing to jump outta bed,or leave your friends or family on a moments notice,if its reasonable. And if its reasonable,id feel obligated.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
            I worked about 25 years on the 15h00 to 23h00 or 16h00 to 24h00 shift then was on call until 05h00. I slept from 05h00 to 13h00. My wife worked days. I only have 1 daughter. Wonder why?
            Be glad about that, HS. If you had a gaggle of kids, you'd have to be asking the DW some serious questions!

            Riderboxer: Unfortunately, in some companies they aren't too happy when people "politely refuse" callouts. If you refuse too often, you suddenly find yourself being reassigned to a post 150 miles away...on the other side of a mountain...with no access road the last 30 miles...working a split shift.
            Last edited by SecTrainer; 08-04-2011, 02:14 PM.
            "Every betrayal begins with trust." - Brian Jacques

            "I can't predict the future, but I know that it'll be very weird." - Anonymous

            "There is nothing new under the sun." - Ecclesiastes 1:9

            "History, with all its volumes vast, hath but one page." - Lord Byron

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            • #7
              Originally posted by SecTrainer View Post
              Riderboxer: Unfortunately, in some companies they aren't too happy when people "politely refuse" callouts. If you refuse too often, you suddenly find yourself being reassigned to a post 150 miles away...on the other side of a mountain...with no access road the last 30 miles...working a split shift.
              You are right about that. Its funny,when I was a floater,they always seemed to call me at times where it wouldnt be possible for me to make it in. Anyway,I kept telling the boss and field supervisor that I wanted to stay Floater,well needless to say boss kept offering me jobs so I figured that was his way of saying I better take one. A few of the contracts werent my cup of tea and after finally finding a post that works,iv been doing good. Minus a one or two issues,as you already know.

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              • #8
                I'm out of the house usually from 0830-1900, on Tues. through Sat. It adds up to 45+ hours each week.

                I hang out with my girls when they get up at 0600, but they go to bed right before 1900 so I miss out on that. After I get home, I get quality time in with my wife until we go to bed, usually around 2200. Sometimes have dinner together or sometimes fend for myself, then watch an episode or two of a favorite TV show, take care of the pets and clean up a little, then go to bed.

                I don't really have the network of friends outside of work that I used to-- a couple of guys to hang out with every now and then but mostly I just feel like relaxing at home, and my wife definitely craves some adult interaction after a day with 18-mo twins. So my social life is a bit of a sacrifice, but family first right now, and friends will come back into more prominent play when the girls don't need so much attention.

                I've decided it's just a matter of making the best of the available moments. I do really enjoy having a Monday off, so we can get out of the house for errands or fun and not deal with weekend crowds.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Riderboxer View Post
                  My question is,has working security affected your relationship with you and your family,or even friends.

                  Iv been doing security for quite sometime and it never really has affected me up until recently,while I aint married the girlfriend doesnt really like...
                  Wait 'til you're out for an evening drive with The Bride, and she notices that while she's seeing green lawns with neatly-dressed kids playing, couples out for a stroll downtown, and tidy homes, you're seeing evidence of obsessive/compulsive husbands, sexually abused kids, and 'one-stop shopping' dealers and pimps marketing their wares.

                  A lifetime of public-service employment (of which the private security industry is one aspect) can definately alter your view of the world, and few of your friends or family will be able to relate.
                  Last edited by 5423; 08-05-2011, 12:42 PM.
                  "I'll defend with my life your right to disagree with me" - anonymous

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by 5423 View Post
                    A lifetime of public-service employment (of which the private security industry is one aspect) can definately alter your view of the world, and few of your friends or family will be able to relate.
                    Going off topic & opening a BIG can of worms:

                    I don't see private security as being part of public service. I am paid by a private company to protect that private company. Sometimes protecting the people in the hotel is a by product. The goal is not to protect the people, it is to protect the hotel from the people suing etc if something were to happen to them.
                    I enforce rules and regulations, not laws.
                    Security Officers. The 1st First Responders.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
                      Going off topic & opening a BIG can of worms:

                      I don't see private security as being part of public service. I am paid by a private company to protect that private company. Sometimes protecting the people in the hotel is a by product. The goal is not to protect the people, it is to protect the hotel from the people suing etc if something were to happen to them.
                      So, why didn't you just start another thread
                      Retail Security Consultant / Expert Witness
                      Co-Author - Effective Security Management 6th Edition

                      Contributor to Retail Crime, Security and Loss Prevention: An Encyclopedic Reference

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
                        Going off topic & opening a BIG can of worms:

                        I don't see private security as being part of public service. I am paid by a private company to protect that private company. Sometimes protecting the people in the hotel is a by product. The goal is not to protect the people, it is to protect the hotel from the people suing etc if something were to happen to them.
                        OK, OK; yes, that's technically true for the most part. Admittedly, I used that phrase (1) out of habit, and (2) for want of a better one... and I'm too tired today to rephrase.

                        But the acquired cynicism and suspicion remain the same, whether security or LE... or for that matter, virtually any organization which regularly interacts with the public-at-their-worst.
                        "I'll defend with my life your right to disagree with me" - anonymous

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
                          Going off topic & opening a BIG can of worms:

                          I don't see private security as being part of public service. I am paid by a private company to protect that private company. Sometimes protecting the people in the hotel is a by product. The goal is not to protect the people, it is to protect the hotel from the people suing etc if something were to happen to them.
                          Well, I get your point, but the goal is to still protect the people (staff and guests) while on your property. It's not all about liability, but also about customer service and reputation. If your hotel is known as being unsafe, you aren't going to do very well in business. If you have good customer service and your guests feel safe, you will get more business.

                          So it really is about protecting staff and guests, as well as the property and assets.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by HotelSecurity View Post
                            Going off topic & opening a BIG can of worms:

                            I don't see private security as being part of public service. I am paid by a private company to protect that private company. Sometimes protecting the people in the hotel is a by product. The goal is not to protect the people, it is to protect the hotel from the people suing etc if something were to happen to them.
                            Well I guess that could depend somewhat on the type of security your doing. However,if a major disaster occurs to the people,guess whose to blame and everyone comes looking for.

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                            • #15
                              Well I know I was working 50+hrs a wk and was still on call. Me and my family were actually on the way to the zoo when I got called in on my only day off in about a month. But the worste would prob be them calling me on my wedding day and asking if I could work that night....

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